She’s gone, off down the road, swinging her great big shoulder bag. I’m standing here with three hundred pounds in my hand. One month rent and one month deposit. What the hell have I done?
Did I ask for references, no. Did I ask for proof that she’s got a job, no. Did I show any sense and firmness at all, no I bloody didn’t. She overwhelmed me with friendship and enthusiasm and I crumbled like a chocolate truffle. She’s coming back tomorrow after work, with her clothes and I haven’t even discussed the kitchen stuff with her or laundry or any – bloody – thing that matters. I am useless, hopeless.
It’s no good sitting here crying, I’ll ring Joanie, I know she’ll yell at me, tell me I’m an idiot and she’ll be right but at least she’ll listen.
Oh, yeah, of course she’s not in, why would she be in just because I need to talk to her. I’ll bet she’s out with her mum and dad, off in the pub somewhere, having a nice carvery, or maybe she’s gone to the pictures with Billy. Oh bugger. I must stop swearing.
I am so thoroughly disgusted with myself, I really am. How could I do that, just because she was all bubbly and jolly and had a rotten time when she was little and then all that bad luck with flats and stuff. What if she hasn’t, what if it’s all lies, how would I know?
No, no, this can’t happen. I’ll tell her I’ve changed my mind. I didn’t even get her mobile number so I’ll have to wait until tomorrow, when she turns up with her bags and stuff and then turn her away. Shit, I can’t do that. How can I do that? I couldn’t do that to anybody. No, what I’ll have to do is say that she can stay for a month and then I’ll give her the deposit back and she’ll have to find somewhere else. Actually, yeah that’s a good idea. Maybe after a month it’ll turn out to be all right, yeah, maybe a month’s trial is the way to go. That’s what I’ll do a month’s trial. I’ll tell her tomorrow, we can just see how it goes for the next four weeks, with the understanding that, if it doesn’t work out, then there’s no hard feelings and she moves out again.
Yes, I feel better now. Actually I can put this money in my bank tomorrow and that’ll be good for my balance, musn’t spend it though, not the deposit. I suppose I can spend the half that’s this month’s rent. Really it should go in the bank for the mortgage, yes that’s what I’ll do. I’ll put it towards the mortgage and then next month the account won’t be overdrawn. Hmm, now I think about it this has worked out really well. I’ll just have a visitor for a month, the money will give me a bit of a breathing space and then I can just ask her to move out again. Yeah, don’t know why I was upset, this is good.
I’ll just take a couple of pounds down to the offy and get a bottle of white wine, a bit of a celebration. Oh, I know, I’ll buy two and then when she arrives tomorrow we can have a drink and it’ll make it easier to talk about the whole month trial thing.
Don’t think I’ll mention this to Joanie just yet, well it’s only for a month so there’s no need to give her ammunition, she’s always telling me I’m too weak. Well, I’m not going to be, one month. Just one month. Right, where’s my coat.