I am in the middle of trying to publish The Grave with Createspace and spent a lot of yesterday on that. I recently published Who Follows and I was very impressed with the quality of the finished product.
In addition I am waiting for inspiration for my next serial and so I’ll fill this little space with my entry for last weeks Flash Fiction Competition on Authonomy. Jacob is now available as a free pdf download so help yourself. 🙂
The buzz word this week was Result.
Paying it Forward
Once she got her breath back and her heart had slowed to something approaching normal Anne turned to where Simon was sitting beside her, eyes closed listening to the football on his ipad.
She glanced again at the little piece of paper in her hand. She checked the numbers again. 184.108.40.206.5.3. Her tummy did a little jumpy thing and she thought she might be sick.
In a minute she would tell him, in just a minute, but first she needed to hold on to this one last moment. Once she spoke everything would change and it would change forever, absolutely, no question.
The gate next door rattled, Gina and the kids coming home, she could hear them giggling. The baby stirred in his sleep and murmured quietly, she leaned to the bouncy chair and stroked his cheek. The clock on the mantel ticked and the blackbird in the garden practised his love song. It was all so gentle, so homely and familiar.
In her state of heightened excitement it wasn’t difficult though for her mind to go back, this fizzy bubbly feeling was so close to the other sensations, the fear and panic and the desperation that had nearly driven her over the edge. In the other time, before Simon and baby Patrick and the blackbird.
Nights in the rain and days in the dirt running and hiding and trying to keep some sort of life together.
She had come such a long way and it was all so very precious, so normal. She knew that for many people normal wasn’t enough, that thousands, probably millions of people who might have found themselves in this place where she was now would be overwhelmed by their good fortune, and that was the whole problem wasn’t it. She didn’t want to be overwhelmed, never again, she wanted to be normal. Normal was priceless.
She closed her eyes, what should she do? and as she did the sound of a mobile phone out in the street swept her back and down, down to the darkest depths that she had ever visited, back to the pit she had believed she would never be able to climb out of and the kindness of a stranger and palpable love that had come down the line and gathered her up and lifted her away from the horror and saved her from destruction.
She looked again at her pretty little house, at her darling husband and her baby more precious than life itself and she knew what she must do.
She went into the study room and filled in the envelope and then she dialled the number.
“Hello Samaritans Jane speaking.”
“Hello. I am sending an envelope to you, it has a lottery ticket in it. Please don’t throw it away, have it checked. You’ll understand when you get it, can you make sure everyone knows. I don’t want to give my name.”
“Oh, okay. I’ll make a note. Is there anything else you want to talk about.”
“No, not now, you saved me, one of you saved me once. Thank you.”
She put down the phone and went back into the lounge. Simon was just walking through into the kitchen, she moved to him and wrapped her arms around his strong young body.
“Do you want a cuppa?”
“Oh yes, please lovely.”
“Hey, did you check the lottery ticket.”
“Yeah, usual result. Nothing this week, but then we’ve got all we need haven’t we.”
“Yeah, course we have.”