The Flat Share

another blast from the past. I remember that I really enjoyed writing this especially at the end when I thought I’d painted myself – well my characters into a corner and had to just carry on writing until they found their way out.

It’s never been published because it’s a funny length and a total dialogue piece but I like it so I thought I’d give it a another run.

 

CHAPTER 1

What a totally shit day.

As if it wasn’t bad enough that my salary cheque hasn’t cleared, my account’s overdrawn and I have three pound fifty in my purse to last until Monday. Then I go and have some sort of “mental spasm” or something and lift that bra in Marks.  What was I thinking?  I have never, ever done anything like that, not ever, it’s just not me.  Even when the other kids were helping themselves to the pick and mix in Woolies I didn’t join in.

I went out intending to do a Saturday meander around the shops, maybe treat myself to a bit of something, a pair of socks, a bottle of nail varnish, something anyway to celebrate payday.  Well of course that all crashed and burned when the hole in the wall delivered it’s verdict in pale grey – Loser – nothing for you, go away and take your stupid plastic with you, No Mark.

Still though I never would have believed that I could do something as awful as pinching a bra.  Thank heavens that kid dropped her teddy and the security guard yelled out.  I don’t think I’ll ever forget that feeling when I thought he was yelling at me, Okay, I’ll be honest, I did wet my pants a bit, truly.  That was horrible, absolutely horrible and it certainly taught me a lesson.  I don’t know how they do it, how do they have the nerve.  God, no it was awful.  Anyway, the bra is back with its chums in M&S or it will be when they find it near the door and take it back to the knicker department.  Shit, my hands are still shaking.

I need a drink.  I know there’s no wine left, I threw the bottle in the recycling on my way to town and I know there’s no brandy left.  Me and Joanie finished that last Tuesday when she came round after that row with Billy.  What is there in the cupboard, Advocaat eurgh, I don’t think so, sherry – weeeeell, maybe. Oh I know someone once told me that if you mix sherry with lemonade it makes a killer shandy.

Hmmm, not bad, shame that was the last of the sherry, well maybe it’s for the best.  I’d better have something to eat, I feel a bit squiffy now.  Beans again, oh well at least they’re low fat.

I wonder if the card that I left in the shop window was a good idea.  I can’t manage any longer on my own here.  It’s so horrible never having any spare cash, huh who am I kidding, spare cash. It’s only spare if it’s extra and right now I don’t even have enough, never mind any extra.  Still and all though a flat mate.  That spare bedroom is minute, and I like being on my own when I get in from work.  What about the kitchen, what if I get somebody who’s messy.  Then what about dishes and stuff, do we share or do they bring their own, and if they do where will we put them.  Oh I haven’t thought this through have I.  It was okay when it was me and Phil but a stranger, can I really share with a stranger.

Well, if I don’t then the flat’ll have to go.  Then what, back home to Mum’s or I’ll have to find a share myself , so it’s frying pans and fires a bit.  Shit it’s all a bit of a mess, I wish I had some more of that sherry.

I’ll sleep on it and then probably tomorrow I’ll take the card back and see if I can’t think of another way to get out of this.  I could try for a loan I suppose.  Oh God, do I really want to go down that road.  I could ask Mum, no it’s not fair she’d say yes even if she couldn’t afford it.  Bed, that’s the answer and then look at it with a fresh eye tomorrow…

Phone, that’s my phone, where the hell is it, bag, bag, ah “Hello, Charlotte Reid”

“The card? Flat share?.  Oh, oh yes, sorry I only put it in today.  I didn’t expect to have any interest so soon.  Oh, come round, well no, no not today, I’ve erm I’ve got people coming.  Tomorrow, okay, in the morning.  Eleven then.  Oh your name, yes Samantha.  Okay, right see you tomorrow.”

Shit, shit, shit.  Oh bugger I must stop swearing.  Now, what am I going to do?  I suppose I can always say no, tell her I’ve changed my mind.  Can this day get any worse, I’m goin’ to bed before the bloody roof falls in, – shit I must stop swearing.